The benefits of raking leaves

Sure, there are cardio benefits, and there's the feeling of a job well done, but the real benefits of raking leaves come after the leaves are piled up.

A little something to brighten your day.

Fun with resonant frequencies

The rake broke and the handle needed to be re-tapered. This is what happened when I started sanding. The kids made me sand the handle nearly into oblivion watching the little circles march up the handle.

The 21-Word Review: The Dark Knight (In-Flight Movie)

The words “Dark Knight” and “In Flight Movie” should never be written together. Let’s forget this happened and rent the DVD.

The 21-Word Review: Hancock (In-Flight Movie)

Someone pitched “Will Smith hero movie” and the money flowed. Big budgets have killed worse movies, but I expected more here.

The 21-Word Review: Jumper (In-Flight Movie)

The holes in the universe that are important to the movie are metaphors for the holes in the plot that aren’t.

The Wheel Turns

Sixteen years ago today, I took a blind date to a Georgia Tech football game using tickets donated by a friend. The game went well, we continued on to dinner, a movie, and a long conversation at the Dark Horse bar. Ten hours after picking up my blind date, I called my best friend from high school to let her know that I'd just met the girl I was going to marry.

And, a little less than 2 years later, I did.

Tomorrow, sixteen years and one day after that fateful first date, I will be taking my little girl to her first Georgia Tech football game using tickets donated by a friend. It's going to be a daddy-daughter outing with just the two of us. We'll ride a train down to the game, have fun with all of the people in the stands, eat bad food, cheer loudly, and maybe learn a little bit about football.

The wheel turns, and what a marvelous wheel it is.

Are you busy Saturday?

Are you planning to be in the Atlanta area this Saturday? Are you looking for something to do?

I'm coordinating one of the many projects for DUMC's Great Day of Service. My group will be paining the interior of a house in downtown Atlanta. The owner is a very nice woman who is, unfortunately, no longer able to keep up with the maintenance on the house. The inside walls haven't been painted in about 40 years and she would really, really like to have them all done.

Due to an unexpected conflict, my group of 10-12 people has been reduced to about 7, and I could certainly use the help.

To add a it more pressure, here's a photo of the homeowner's granddaughter, who insisted on being in every picture that I took. How can you say no to that face?

The 21-Word Review: The Steel Wave by Michael Sharra

There have been so many movies and books about D-Day, it’s surprising to find how much more there is to learn.

The 21-Word Review: Drillbit Taylor (In-Flight Movie)

Bad even for an Owen Wilson movie. Bad even for a stereotypical bully movie. Just really, really, really, really, really bad.

The 21-Word Review: The Bank Job (In-Flight Movie)

The moral of the story is that you should never put pictures of yourself with royals in a safe deposit box.

The 21-Word Review: Married Life (In-Flight Movie)

If you take your wife to this movie, be sure to stay to the end or she might suspect your motives.

The 21-Word Review: Forgetting Sarah Marshall (In-Flight Movie)

The best part about watching this movie on an airplane is that the editors remove all of the male frontal nudity.

The 21-Word Review: In Bruges (In-Flight Movie)

Violent, gory, explicit, profane, hilarious, fascinating, architectural, clever, interesting, compelling. A magnificent mixture that your wife will hate and you’ll love.

The 21-Word Review: Born Standing Up by Steve Martin

If you read only one autobiography by a comedian known for white suites and arrow hats, let this be the one.

The 21-Word Review: Iron Man (In-Flight Movie)

Any movie that opens with AC/DC, ends with Black Sabbath, and has a lot of explosions in between cannot be beat.

The 21-Word Review: Leatherheads (In-Flight Movie)

George Clooney does a passable Frank Sinatra in the Ocean’s movies, but he’s less convincing as a Cary Grant stand in.

Why I don't drink Diet Coke in Japan

Alternate titles:

• Coked up SJP
• New Taste! More SJP in every drop!
• Sex and the Aluminum Cylinder
• Sucking on SJP in Japan
• I don't know why people think Diet Coke is a chick soda
• Diet Coke Fail
  

Extra credit: Guess which of the alternate titles will result in the most erroneous hits from Google searches.

The 21-Word Review: Nim’s Island (In-Flight Video)

I imagine even children targeted by this film would question the plausibility of the plot. (Shame on U2 for “Beautiful Day”.)

The 21-Word Review: Music and Lyrics (Hotel HBO)

This time he's a washed up ... athlete? No. Musician! And she's his maid? No. Plant waterer? Yes!

Who keeps paying for these?

Opryland v. Las Vegas

In a previous post, I made a statement that could be seen as disparaging to Nashville in general and the Opryland Hotel in specific. I have now spent several days at the Opryland. Below is a scientific comparison showing the benefits of each location, provided for your use in determining where to celebrate your second wedding.

Advantage Vegas is indicated via the Elvis icon.
Advantage Opryland is indicated via the Johnny Cash icon.

Vegas	Opryland	Advantage
Large, complicated hotel layout that requires a map to find your way from your room to the lobby.	Check.	Neither
Scads of scantily-clad women running around ignoring the conventioneers.	Check, but that may have been due to the Victoria’s Secret convention being held in the hall one level up.	Neither
Obsequious and helpful employees obviously working on a larger tip.	Same, but more subtle. Score one for southern hospitality.
The slim chance of winning a few dollars at the ubiquitous casinos.	No gambling. This is the Bible belt.
The enormous chance of losing many dollars at the ubiquitous casinos.	No gambling. This is the Bible belt.
Tourists in sequins going out for the evening.	Tourists in sequins and boots going out for the evening.	Let's call that a draw.
Poor television choices – they want you in the casinos.	Adequate television choices, but all of the country music stations are at the top of the dial.
Incredibly expensive room rates and punitive tax adders.	Incredibly expensive room rates and punitive tax adders.	Everyone but the tourists.
Numerous shops inside the hotel complex selling high end items that you can’t afford.	Numerous shops inside the hotel complex selling everything from high-end to junk touristy tchotchkes for the kids.	Singles and DINKs Me
Very fancy and overpriced restaurants throughout the complex.	Not fancy but still overpriced restaurants throughout the complex.
No way to see the outside world so you completely lose track of the time of day.	The occasional window to the outside world.
Pulsating screens advertising night clubs for people much younger and more attractive than you.	Pulsating screens advertising one night club for people much younger and more attractive than you.	(People younger than me and voyeurs.)
Walking on the strip is its own entertainment.	They closed the Opryland Theme Park next door, but the mall is interesting.
Have to fly and take a cab to get to a Vegas hotel.	Within driving distance of my house.

The 21-Word Review: The Life and Times of the Thunderbolt Kid by Bill Bryson

Always entertaining, occasionally inexplicably profane, often hilarious, somewhat informative. I hope my first book is half as good as Bryson's worst.

The 21-Word Review: The Forbidden Kingdom (DVD)

The Jet Li / Jackie Chan fight comes about 30 minutes in. That's what you're watching for, isn't it? (It's a draw.)

The 21-Word Review: The Fantastic 4, Rise of the Silver Surfer (DVD)

Have you ever watched something entertaining, but then later discovered that you learned nothing? A Barack-Obama-speech kind of movie.

The 21-Word Review: Clapton: The Autobiography by Eric Clapton

Among others, there's a photograph of an engagement that's not in the text. A great autobiography crying for a great biography.

Speaking at the FTTH Conference

I will be speaking at the Fiber to the Home Conference in Nashville, TN next Monday. Last year was Vegas, this year it's the Opryland Hotel. Moving on up.

The topic of my presentation is "Next Generation PON: What is Beyond GPON?". It promises to be a thrill-a-minute ride combining pyrotechnics ripped from a Michael Bay production, heartwarming characters straight from the mind of Tyler Perry, and a stunning twist a la M. Night Shyamalan.

Seriously, though, the presentation should be quite good (in my humble opinion) with some very useful information compiled into an engaging format (no longer humble, but still an opinion). And, the last time I checked, there are about 8 other competing events at the show in the same time frame. So please come by.

If it's only the two of us, I'll spring for doughnuts.